The Joy of Living Life on My Terms
From the Desk of Michele C Foster
Ahh! The Joy of Living Life on My Terms . . .
If that sounds easy, it’s not always been. If that sounds trite, I can assure you it’s not. To be responsible for myself first has been the greatest gift of love and self-respect I could have ever done.
If I am asked to do something for another – two things happen;
– I see how it benefits me or doesn’t.
– Yes means yes, and no, means no.
The reasoning behind this is simple, desiring to feel good about my decision comes quickly when I evaluate the situation and see how it makes me FEEL. Then, if I say yes, I honor that commitment, and if I say no I honor that too.
There is a great story told by Oprah Winfrey. When we all found out how “rich” she became, her dear friend Stevie Wonder came to her and asked her to donate to something he was orchestrating. She thought of how if she said no, (and he knows she has money) he may never talk to her again or be her friend anymore. However, she decided to stay true to herself and she declined the “opportunity”, and Stevie Wonder said “ok”! It was that simple . . . get it? READ MORE
One day many years ago, I was taking a shortcut through a car park. A sudden spontaneous thought came into my mind with such force that I actually said the words out loud, to no one in particular: “I’m so ANGRY!”
Hearing those words stopped me in my tracks. I knew I’d said them, but I couldn’t figure out why. Nothing had happened that morning to make me angry, and there was no specific incident the anger was about.
In that moment I saw myself as if my mind had taken a photographic snapshot. There I was, standing in the middle of the car park – jaws clenched, brows knit in a frown, shoulders tensed.
I knew then that anger had become my default state. My most spontaneous thought was one of anger. Until now I have no idea how I’d gotten that way, though I suppose it was the result of allowing the cares of the world to shape my subconscious. READ MORE
Why Is Saying ‘No’ So Important?
Do you consider yourself a people pleaser?
Do you find yourself saying “yes” to people only to regret it moments later?
Do you tend to put others’ needs before your own?
If you answered in the affirmative to any of the above questions, it may serve you to become better at saying “no.”
William Ury, in his book The Power of a Positive No: Save the Deal, Save the Relationship—and Still Say No, suggests the dilemma we encounter in saying “no” often stems from an internal struggle between plugging into our own sense of power and a simultaneous desire to cater to, or foster, a relationship. Ury says we often find ourselves doing one of three things in response to a request… READ MORE
How to Live Your Best Life Starting Today
As human beings, one of our deepest-rooted desires is to have a meaningful and happy existence. You’ve probably heard of the saying, “Live your best life.” It’s good advice.
We all want to feel connected to both ourselves and others. We want to feel that we’re part of something important and that we’re making a difference in the world.
We want to look back at our lives and our achievements and be proud. In short, we want what the saying says: to live our best lives.
But what does it really mean to live your best life?
You are a unique individual, so living your best life is exclusive to you. Your best life will reflect your true values. It will be made up of what makes you happy and will be colored by what making a difference means to you… READ MORE
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